There was something that I couldn’t stop thinking about in
the first episode. It surprised me that Joan was exhausted, emotional, and
frustrated with her new baby. This shouldn’t have surprised me at all, since I
felt those exact things after my kids were born. But for some reason, though I
know they had many more challenges in life than we have today, I still see
women back then as somewhat invincible, unruffled, and kind of perfect. I guess I see my own mom that way too. When I was
at my wit’s end with exhaustion, sadness, and crazy hormones about a month
after having my daughter, I, teary-eyed, asked my mom how she got through it
all. She basically said “she just did.” And that was it. She didn’t elaborate,
she didn’t have tips to share, she just made it through. Not once, not twice, but 3 times. They didn’t know what to expect when they
were expecting. They didn’t have Babywise, or The No Cry Sleep Solution. There
were no fancy swaddling blankets, ColicCalm drops, white noise machines hidden
in baby sheep, and “Magic” Swings, as my friends and I like to refer to them.
The 5 S’s hadn’t even been invented. And
they intentionally put us to bed on our stomachs, yet we somehow survived. So
my question is, is all that “stuff”: information, advice, and actual stuff really
necessary? Is a book telling me my baby should be sleeping 12 hours a night by
12 weeks helping me, or setting me up to feel like I’ve failed as a mom when it
doesn’t happen?
I went to visit my grandmother the other day at her nursing
home. She’s 93, but looks and acts much younger. I love that little lady to
pieces. And boy do I hope I inherit her genes. I never tell her when I’m
coming, but I try to make it over there once a week with one, or both, of my
little ones. Every single time I get there she looks at me and says “Am I
dreaming, or are you really here?” She’s THAT excited to see me. We were sitting having coffee the other day and
she got a little choked up. She told me
she thinks I’m doing a great job with the kids, and went on to say she wished she
had done things differently when she was a mom. She kept saying “Things were
different back then, we just didn’t know what you girls know today. All the
books, all the stuff you hear on the news, what’s good, what’s bad…we just
didn’t know.” Yelling was often, bedtime
stories were rare… there just didn’t seem to be a lot of mom/child
interaction. I could tell she had some
regrets, and I couldn’t help but get emotional listening to her talk.
So even though I think I drove (and still drive) myself a
little crazy interpreting and practicing all the “stuff” I read in books,
online, or see on the news… I admit, I once drove to a store 45 minutes away to
get another Miracle Swaddling Blanket because I misplaced mine, and couldn’t
bear doing bedtime without it…I’m glad we have so much knowledge at our
fingertips. Everything we need to know
(or at least think we need to know) is a literally a click away. And I’d rather
be on the side of too much information, than none at all.
Which brings me back to Mad Men. Those scenes when they are smoking and drinking while pregnant? Makes me CRINGE. And don’t even get me started on Betty’s parenting. Again, cringe. Speaking of the ex-Mrs. Draper…where did she go? She finished Sally’s ice cream and we haven’t heard from her since. What seemed to be a budding plotline as she almost faced a life altering diagnosis, seemed to disappear as quickly as the sundae itself.
Which brings me back to Mad Men. Those scenes when they are smoking and drinking while pregnant? Makes me CRINGE. And don’t even get me started on Betty’s parenting. Again, cringe. Speaking of the ex-Mrs. Draper…where did she go? She finished Sally’s ice cream and we haven’t heard from her since. What seemed to be a budding plotline as she almost faced a life altering diagnosis, seemed to disappear as quickly as the sundae itself.
Hmmm…I wonder what those writer’s have up their little
vintage sleeves….
-East Coast Mom
 |
| A visit with Great Grandma Marie |
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